And it feels like...

Sooo yeah...I'm tired. You smiled at me today and reminded me of all the things that you used to do to make me smile....and i used to do to make you smile...and honestly i felt helpless..and empty. Or something i can't really explain it. But i thought of an analogy today...Think of a cake.. now not just any cake but a gorgeous cake...birthday cake if you want. And its so pretty but somebody just came and cut the cake and took the prettiest part and it and now there's a BIG whole in it...if you made sense of that analogy that's how i feel..and its so frustrating that a look from your direction will bring back every emotion i thought i had thrown away....I'm so tired. And i wanna be done...but I've come to the conclusion that i can't stand being your friend..and i can't stand not being that either..it hurts either way..Me and my friend had a conversation today about the Pursuit of happiness and every little wish is for happiness but honestly how can anybody be happy in real life with a piece of cake missing!!